Tragedy is humbling. It brings us to our knees. It is an attack against all we hold dear, and we wonder, how can I deal with this? It requires introspection, deep into our souls, as we consider the ramifications of loss. In a way, grief is soul-wrenching selfishness. We think no one can understand. We focus on our own feelings and ignore the necessaries of life–eating, sleeping, interacting with others. We want to be alone to suffer in silence, to review in our memories to times that were different, to ignore other things around us. We may even ignore the changing of day into night, since the night of our souls is all encompassing. We are, frankly, undone for a spell. We cannot cope with the change the tragedy will bring. We mourn.
The first day of Lent in 2018 was a national day of mourning as the events of the Parkland shooting pierced the nation’s consciousness, its very soul. We felt parents’ grief. We felt teachers’ pain. We felt outrage. We asked questions: How could this happen? Why did it happen? How can we cope with the loss of so many young lives, lives that showed such promise, lives that could have made such differences in the nation, lives that became real as we grew to understand just how much we had lost.
Eventually, we give in to the stages of mourning: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. These are stages of progression and regression understood from Kubler-Ross definitions of the grieving and dying processes. Greif counselors aid persons dealing with tragedy by using these as guidelines. By no means are these the only reactions to grief, and they can, depending upon the circumstances, flow from one to the other indiscriminately. One’s reaction to tragedy is individual, long-lasting, and one’s coping mechanisms can veil the deep sense of loss a person, or a nation, even, can experience long after the original reason.
Consider the reaction to 9.11. The nation experienced the shock of the loss of iconic infrastructure the and thousands of families who mourned. But we lost something else. We lost our feeling of invulnerability. We discovered that as a nation, we could face a terrorist act on our own soul. We asked, how could this happen? What does this mean? Who did this? Why did this happen? Who should we blame? How do we fix this? How do we prevent this from happening again? Who is to blame? Let’s go get ’em.
The Parkland shooting was no less a tragedy. The death or illness of a loved one is no less a tragedy. The earthquake this month in Turkey and Syria is no less a tragedy. The rail disaster in East Palestine, Ohio is no less a tragedy. The war in Ukraine is no less a tragedy. Homelessness and an alien invasion is no less a tragedy. Saber rattling among nations is no less a tragedy. Even, personal loss of a loved one or even a pet is a tragedy. Above all, loss of hope is a tragedy.
We are vulnerable.
When we have no faith in a sovereign God, in His promises, we can think that a tragedy can topple us into despair. Understand, even with this faith, we are free to mourn. It does not prevent grief. But we mourn with an understanding that good can come from tragedy, and that God grants us ultimate peace.
We read in Romans 8, 32, 37 these words: “If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but gave Him up for us all–how will He not also along with Him, graciously give us all things?…No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us.
Read my Lenten prayer psalm today from my book Restore My Soul Psalms, A Lenten Journey. May it bless this second day of Lent, 2023
MY PSALM 301 TRAGED Note: The tragic Parkland, FL school shooting, claiming seventeen lives, occurred the first day of Lent, 2018.
Heavenly Father, Creator of all things, Abba, Father,
Praised be Your Name in the heavens and on earth,
For You have heard my cry; I can feel Your Presence
Because Jesus brings me to Your loving arms
When I cry out to You for strength this hour.
My heart is heavy with grief
Because Your children have strayed so far
From Eden’s perfection.
Senseless killing of students in a school
Brings me to tears. Do You weep too?
Mothers and fathers, sisters, brothers, spouses
Mourn for their beloved dear ones
Ripped so quickly from their arms
Without words of goodbye.
Lost potential, all with dreams for tomorrow
Now like withered grass blowing in the wind.
And for those parents, show Your mercy
For You indeed know what it is to see Your Son
Face the cruelty of violence and suffer death
To pay sin’s penalty, Your grace to share.
Give them strength, share Your Sovereign power
To face what comes next:
The empty chair, the silent laugh, the fading memories,
The denial, the tears, the anger,
And agonizing grief.
Bring them before You,
To feel Your compassionate Presence,
Until they can forgive and heal soul-depth wounds.
May their strong testimony promote change.
May we see some good come from this tragedy.
Abba, Father, hold us all in Your arms
That we can find comfort
In knowing that before even our first breaths,
You know the hour of our returning to You,[1]
And that Your children, those who knew You in this life
Are safely with You this day in paradise.
For all of us who mourn, bring us peace
That peace that passes all mortal understanding
To fulfill our purpose, to love You well
Until, when our tasks are done
You call us Home for eternity with You and them. Amen.
[1]Psalm 139: 16
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